I see this magnet every time I need to.
Plans for the night
Enroll in grad school
Finish sewing green dress started weeks ago
What I did tonight:
Went to sleep.
Nope. Not that much.
No- not so much. I wiped a lot of snot off of noses with my sleeve, but no. Poop eating is never going to happen.
Who is this woman? I need to know so I can ensure I never go to her house for a meal.
And I just want to whole-heartedly agree with the first two commenters: I love my children more than life itself, but enough to actually eat poo? I mean, I’m a parent, not the middle segment in a human centipede.
Wipe on pants? Yes.
Wipe on tongue? He’ll no.
"Ignorant non-parents, who don’t know what they’re talking about, imposing ridiculous standards on actual parents because it makes them feel superior. I get it. I don’t like it, but I get it. As bad as you people are, you’re not nearly as horrible as the second type: actual parents with grown children who judge other parents, as if they haven’t been in the exact same situation many times."
There are days…
Where you just want to lock the doors and stay inside. And then there are days that you kinda need to. Those days are the worst.
Hug your kids & send your thoughts for quick capture of those still on the loose in DC.
On the upside- Ads LOVES helicopters!
Nope, that’s wrong.
Woke up and realized it was 9-11. Walking around and especially near the memorial riders I keep feeling the urge to say “Happy September 11th!”
But that’s just not quite right.
Not because its a happy day (Obvs) but because I feel this urge to recognize the day. I feel like I should be saying to strangers, hey, remember? That awful day when everyone in the whole country was on the same side, the strangers helping each other in the street and the lines to donate blood?
I, do too, and it was 12 years ago today. So, happy September 11th- because we don’t have any appropriate greetings for this holiday. Do something good today.
My kid was running in circles screaming “asses asses asses”.
I’m going to take this as a sign that she learned ring around the rosy at school.
An Open Letter to the Mom on the Train
Your child is 6 months old. Maybe. She cannot be “sloppy”. She also cannot sit on a seat by herself. In a different row.
You should also not be feeding her Zebra cakes.
And your 6 year old just said she didn’t want one because she’s on a diet.
It’s time to re-evaluate.
I want to be compassionate here. You’ve probably had a long day. Zebra cakes keep your kids happy on the train, which I appreciate. The reality of your situation is a small tragedy. So go home, get some rest, and try again tomorrow.
It was my little ones first day of (play)school. 12 2year olds and 3 parents at a church for 3 hours. She wasn’t convinced this was going to be awesome. Until she saw the horse. Horse?! Fuck yeah school, lets do this!
Baby Tylenol measuring cup= excellent wine stopper. It even clips on!